A woman who is arguing with her new husband about furniture, wants to find a truce. Mariella Frostrup sympathises
The dilemmaMy husband and I married recently. I am not his first wife. We came together with all our baggage from three decades of separate existence that included furniture, curtains, artwork and one dog. We’ve had our ups and downs deciding how to fit it all into our new home together, and there have been plenty of arguments about which individually “treasured” possessions we no longer have space for in our new life together. We’ve been battling for the last two years and, thankfully, tempers have died down. Except my husband has started buying more, which would be fine if our flat wasn’t already packed, and more importantly if he chose to consult with me before committing. If I don’t like his purchases (the latest a large ornate cabinet), he gets angry and say I am ungrateful. As for children, I’m beginning to think they’ll never be an option as we simply don’t have the space!
Mariella replies It’s certainly a conundrum. In this brave new world of recoupling and rejigged families and often not even getting together until half our lives have already passed, it’s a dilemma that’s on the rise. Just when you thought that finally in maturity you’d found the perfect person to settle down with, war breaks out over the lives you both drag along with you.
Having lived through a similar process I can’t say I envy what you are going through. How much simpler to dump the lot…
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